Making the Plunge

This has been a year full of transition and coping and working on finding and nurturing the stability inside. 2011 has required that I roll with various punches and surf the waves, which has been my go-to metaphor. One of the things that has repeatedly popped into my mind over the year thus far has been the penguin dream from Fight Club.

"Slide."

My older sister always refers to the scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade where Indy has to step into the chasm, taking a "leap of faith".

Two days ago, I had a flash of intent and I made a decision. I'm not sure if I've ever made a decision before I knew it was a decision to be made. It was a level of going with the gut that I don't recall ever having experienced. I decided that I'm going to start yoga instructor training now. I'm starting the nine-month training at the Yoga Center of Minneapolis. Four weeks ago, I had spoken with the woman conducting the training and decided that I'd wait until the next session. Now I'm starting with two sessions to make up. That part will be easy.

I'm excited about this and I'm scared. I'm adding to debt by doing this, but I'm also finally going forward with a goal. Those are the two things pulling at me regarding this decision. Somehow everything will be all right. Somehow everything will work out. I have no idea how or when. More and more of my life right now is becoming about flying blind. Only so much can be planned and planned for. If I'm not flexible, I'll surely fail.

Slide.