Usage of Time

As I've mentioned before, I'm in the second period of extremely diminished yoga practice that I've experience in a year that is not directly due to injury. As has been typical, I have been pretty unforgiving of myself while sliding in micro-practices throughout each day. Just this past week it dawned on me that I haven't really been slacking as much as I've been thinking. Instead, I've been using this time differently, exercising different yoga muscles.

A longtime friend of mine in Portland, OR always seems to know what to say to me when I go through these periods. The most effective thing she said to me recently was "That's okay: you've been doing a lot of mental yoga." I guess she's right. If nothing else, since my arrival in Japan in mid-December, I've been working most on not forcing things and easing into them. I haven't been hammering Japanese language and writing each day, but I practice and enrich in some way or another, even if it's something as basic and broad as cultural observation.

From the physical side of things, I have developed an even greater intimacy with my body. Over the past two decades-plus of my life , I've been cultivating an awareness of my body through various physical activities. Even though one person once described me as having the physical sense of an elephant – not always entirely aware of how much space I take up within a space-limited environment – I still think of myself as having above-average coordination despite my gangly build. Now I find myself even more attuned to little tightnesses in joints and muscles that might have gone unnoticed. My awareness of body positioning and posture seems even more acute. And I still engage in some type of physical activity each day, whether I'm on the job or not.

There is also a great carryover to mental and emotional practices. As I continue to strive to better myself – especially in the areas of patience, forgiveness, and understanding – I find it increasingly easy to identify and call out thoughts that don't seem to fall in line with my expressed goals. In doing so, I can face them. I've learned that it doesn't make them go away any more quickly, but it has been sharpening my practice at nipping them before they affect my disposition too greatly. I'm most appreciative that if I'm struggling, at least I'm not burying or hiding.

This all sounds so self-helpy and granola it's making me a bit queasy, but that doesn't change the fact that it's a true experience. It's nice to feel progress and I appreciate the new knowledge that even when I haven't been working like I think I should, I still wound up working.